Corroboration

Over the coming weeks, Posheys were recruited into the Pinkshirts until there were hundreds to be kitted out in the smart, new uniforms. Tailors ensured a stylish fit. And a training scheme was established to ensure they knew how to conduct foot patrols, drive the Destructors and march. Gronk recruited the exemplary Mrs DeVilliers, who used to teach Snobbier-Than-Thou at the former Snookington School. She had such standing before Gronk’s attempt to harass the Nobody family was derailed. Her undignified fall from grace and the aftershock of disgusting respect and friendliness made Gronk’s stomach turn. Standoffishness seemed to go out of fashion for a short while but now it was back with a vengeance and the best person to give lessons to his Pinkshirts was Mrs DeVilliers. Posheys in the Pinkshirts needed to reawaken their high and mighty attitude.

An initial section of Pinkshirts lined up, swankily dressed in black, with a subtle ‘V’ of pink on show. Each had straight arms by their sides and noses in the air. Mrs DeVilliers walked the line, inspecting the troops.

“Well… what do you think?” Gronk asked.

“Very dapper…” she began.

He almost burst into fawning self-congratulation.

“But, no, this won’t do,” she continued.

Complacency slid from his face. 

“You have the appropriate raised nose, but the expressions are not right,” she insisted. “Don’t slouch! Shoulders back, chest puffed out, head in the air!” She screeched.

“See? I told you not to look so nice,” Gronk rebuked.

The Pinkshirts juddered with displeasure.

“That’s the word,. ‘Nice.’ We need to be more unapproachable, just like in the good times when we looked down on Outsiders. We are serious. We are stuffy. We are nasty,” she hissed. “Come on, chins up. Now stretch your top lips. Yes, a proper stiffened upper lip. There you go. And curl the sides of your mouths downwards. Yes… there you have it!!” she shrieked with satisfaction.

The Pinkshirts stood still with the most overbearing expressions Mrs DeVilliers had seen in a long time.

“I think my work here is done,” she announced bumptiously.

The initiative of superiority was so successful, Gronk rolled it out across all the Pinkshirts. Section after section practiced condescending looks of derision until everyone had it down to a tee. Patrolling in formation was drilled until they became quite professional looking. Behind closed doors the Pinkshirts performed baton swings until they were ready. In Gronk’s esteemed view, it was time to execute a maelstrom of change.

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